Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Friday: So whatcha doing

The end of the week came and I figured I'd hit the gym again.  Pulling into the parking lot I scanned the cars hoping to see that broken down car ;-)   Sure enough, it was parked where it was usually parked.   For whatever reason, tonight was the night I had more game/mojo than normal and when I strolled in, I decided rather than lifting weights I'd go for a jog.  At the time I'd just recovered from a bout of 'the crutches' so I wasn't going to send anyone into awe over my athletic ability.  Not wanting to see creepy, I took the treadmill 2 spots away versus next to her. 

Being a guy sucks.  You always have to make the first move and you face rejection.  She saw me and thankfully said hello.  After a casual bit of chat, I asked her what her plans were for the night.  She replied that she was just going home and going to watch TV.  I said well I didn't have much to do and was hoping to go out but no one was available...SO...she was free to come along, I'd happily pay for her coffee or drink if she drank.  I was almost stunned when she said "OK".   We agreed to go for coffee at a local coffee house but she would go change and I'd go home and shower.   She also agreed I could pick her up at her place...

Little did I know I'd just asked out a former sex professional on a date.  LOL. 

Friday, August 20, 2010

Day 2

Back.  Back doing what so many people do on a nightly basis.  I was at the gym.  I checked in, changed and went out to do my nightly workout.   As I walked down the ramp to the fitness floor I noticed Ms Broken Car on a machine.  She was absorbed in a workout, ear buds turned up to some TV channel in front of her.  

I'm not a dude with a ton of game.  But, I just strolled by her machine hoping she'd see me on the way to my workout.  She looked down at me and smiled and said hi.  She kept working out and I figured well..best to leave her alone and let her do her thing.   I headed into the weight pit to work out.   Working out in the pit, I look up and see her working out, engaged on the treadmill to some TV channel.

A few times she caught me looking at her and I just smiled. She did look back and gave me a smile. If you're a dude, that gives you something to grasp on too.  

My entry into the life of dating a prostitute

Normal day.  Normal life.  I was leaving a certain establishment and on my way to my car.  It's something most of us do on a daily basis.  You think nothing of it.  As I walked toward my car, I noticed a younger woman who was frustrated her car would not start.   As I approached my immediate thought was "this car is a piece of shit".  It was old.  It was rusted.  It was clearly the vehicle of someone that did not have much money & was just hanging on in life.  

As I walked by I could see the frustration this person was having and I asked them if they needed a hand.  She sputtered out the words "it just won't start".

I will predicate this by saying I know jack shit about cars.  I'm not Mr Auto.  I was more likely to take Home Ec in school than Auto shop.  But, as a man, when you see a woman having car problems you always step up to help even if you can't help.  

I asked her if I could try to start the car.  She agreed and I slide behind the seat and went to turn it over.  It made a clicking sound which meant the battery was dead.  I looked at her and said knowingly "I think your battery is dead".  She gave me a look like she had no idea WTF I was talking about LOL.  I said hold on, I can give you a boost.  

I walked over and got my car and drove it over to her car.  I pulled out the booster cables and hooked things up then started her car.  Her car sputtered to life..it's engine starting to roar and I removed the booster cables.  As a man, that's a warm good feeling but in reality I had no clue what I did.  It's just one of those things you do as a man. 

As her car sat there running, I said to her it was best if she let it run a few minutes to charge up the battery and to not turn it off until she got home.  I said you'll at least make it home and be parked and if it won't start tomorrow you'll probably need a new battery.   Mr Auto..or so I pretended.   She just smiled and looked at my car and asked what model it was.  My car is not macho or masculine, I bought it for it's fuel mileage, not for it's girl attraction features or so I thought.

We stood around talking for a bit about life while her battery charged.  Not wanting to see like some crazy creepy guy, I excused myself and said I needed to get home.  She smiled and said OK, see you again calling me by my first name.  

And little did I realize but so began my life dating a prostitute.....

Top of the Totem Pole: The Independent Escort

The very top of the Sex Professional (SP) totem pole is the "Indie".  An Independent Escort is a woman that has full control of who she sees, what she does & what she offers.  Typically, she handles her own bookings, her own clients & her own advertising.   Society refers to these women as "Escorts".  You've probably seen their ads on Craigslist or on the Internet.   Working as an Indie has it's benefits; you can choose what clients to see and when.  You control your career.  But, you also forfeit the safety of working in a MP.  Many Indie's have regular clients they see weekly which offers a level of comfort that other SP's do not have.  

There are downsides to this lifestyle.  Even with regulars you are required to constantly be on call.  You may need to forfeit going to that friends party because you need the business.  And if you are the BF of a woman that is an Indie..it can mean your night out is interrupted by a telephone call from a regular. 

The "indie" SP is essentially self employed and it translates more into a "lifestyle" than an actual job.  While many of these women are together and in control of their lives (sans Pimps) they face great challenges.  If you're dating an Indie SP..you the BF will also face these challenges.

Hookers: The Massage Parlour

You've probably seen a massage parlour or what is commonly called a rub n tug.  They market themselves as a place of "massage" or a "spa" except they don't have that clinical feel to them.  I admit to never having entered one myself.  My experience and knowledge is all second hand.

Massage parlours can be places of massage or places where you can acquire full sex.  They are broken down into two categories, MP's and AMP's.   AMP's are Asian massage parlours, places that employ Asian prostitutes versus those from other cultures.  AMP's often employ women that may have no ability to communicate in English.  Communication is limited and I would assume a limited communication would mean for a poor session.  These places are sometimes associated with human trafficking.  A far more likely scenario is that the Asians employed in these locations are simply more mature women who do not have a marketable value in Asian.  Asian males apparently prefer the services of younger females.

MP's are where SP's (hookers) often get their start.  They have their benefits..the women have an element of safety but exchange that for no control over who they see.  If someone comes in to see you, you're seeing him like it or not.  

Monday, August 16, 2010

Hookers: The Streetwalker

The average citizen probably gets their information on prostitutes from Pretty Woman or from the reports on the nightly news.  The world of prostitution has many levels and is quite complex.   I'll attempt to describe the many different facets of the industry

The Streetwalker:

The streetwalker is the classic definition of what most people recognize as a hooker.   She's that girl, standing on the corner, scantily clad, giving you the eye as you drive by. In the era before the internet, there were many different levels of streetwalkers.  This appears to have changed with venues like Craigslist or websites for certain massage parlours. 

The modern streetwalker is the lowest form of prostitute and most often association with disease, the pimp & sadly, violence.  These women are often the victims of random violence, or the horrors inflicted on them from animals like Robert Pickton.  Drug addiction is rather common in the world of streetwalkers, especially the use of crack & Meth.  Another term for streetwalkers is know as "car dates".  

The common misconception is that all streetwalkers have pimps.  While this is generally the reality, not every streetwalker does.  The world of pimping and streetwalkers is dark and dangerous.  Many of the girls are shuffled around from city to city and don't stay long in one place.  The idea behind doing this is simple; its to stop these women from making contacts.  Those controlled by pimps and organized crime are victims and required to meet quotas and if they do not they face the wrath of their controllers.  They may be denied their fix of drugs or physically harmed.  While it's easy to assume these women are "diseased filth" they are victims & do not have control of their lives.   The next time you read about how another streetwalker was killed while working, see that person as a human, as the daughter, as someone's friend, not as diseased filth.  
 

Prostitution: Reality versus Perception

I know what many of you are thinking.  You're thinking gross, how could a guy do this?  Is he crazy?  What about his health, the threat of STD's?  I suspect I'm getting two trains of thought.  One is from female readers who probably think one of two things:

1.  This person is absolutely disgusting.
2.  Hmmm, interesting, because I worked as a prostitute to pay my way through university or because I'm a single mom and I need to feed my kids (or maybe you just like sex, but let's be honest, that's not a socially acceptable answer)

Now, if you're a male reader the  vast majority of you will say nothing, look at your spouse and agree with her on point 1 from above.  But, the reality is the vast majority of you have used the services of a hooker.  Perhaps you felt socially inadequate and your only means to be physical with a female was to hire one.  Perhaps you needed something your wife is unable to offer you sexually.  Perhaps you were at a bachelor party and it was available.  Perhaps you have sexual kinks that certain sex workers are able to fulfill (BSDM, etc).  Perhaps you were on a business trip and cloaked in anonymity you thought you would try it in your hotel room.  Perhaps you were single, home alone drinking and just had a sexual urge and you needed more than masturbation.

Whatever the reason, if you are male, there is a good chance you've paid for sex at one point in your life.  You know it.  I know it.  The common perception of "Johns" is that they are low life scum unable to form proper, loving relationships with women.  They view women as sexual objects.  They are the downtrodden scum of the world that live in bachelor apartments above porno stores in the bad area of town.  No such creature exists in the picture perfect world of suburbia.  If they are not low life scum, they they could only be a politician or a highly paid golfer.

 That's the perception of Johns.  The reality is that the men you see around you have probably been a john at some point.  Your boss at work, your professor at university, your brother, the nice guy that says good morning to you every day.  And yes, that also includes your husband.  It's fitting that a client of a prostitute would be called a "John" because John is such a common name.